Dear Reader,

Tend to What Matters

In your final moments, as you look back on your life,
what will you wish you had done more of?

Whatever that is
that is what you should be doing more of now.

My friend Paulette asked this question on Facebook on Christmas Day.
It stayed with me. It struck me deeply.

I wondered whether Dieter ever had time to think about a question like that.
Or did he?

He was gone in the blink of an eye.

I don’t know.

What I do know is this:
I am deeply grateful that I had time with him on the Saturday before he passed.

We decided to go on one of our usual drives—through the back roads toward Lake St. Clair, then along the Detroit River all the way to Port Huron, a border town to Canada, separated by the river and connected by that beautiful blue bridge.

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I always loved those road trips with him.

They were a time of bonding.
Him driving, me sitting beside him, looking out the window.
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Talking… or not.
Silence was never awkward for us.

In fact, it was often easier for Dieter to talk when he didn’t have to look me in the eyes.
He was a thoughtful man, careful with his words.
Saying the right thing mattered to him.

And doing that while also holding eye contact?
It was simply easier when his gaze was on the road, on where we were going.

That Saturday, as we drove along the river, he spoke about how he wanted to spend his free time riding his bicycle.

He imagined crossing the border on our bikes—using the soon-to-be-outdated Ambassador Bridge—riding on the Canadian side toward Lake Huron.

He simply wanted to do more things that were fun for him.

He was tired of his work.
And maybe tired, too, of the constant repairs on our house.

Yes, we talked about that on our drive.

So when I return to Paulette’s question—
​What would I wish I had done more of?

The answer comes easily:

Having fun.
Laughing more.
Playing more.

From a quilter’s point of view, it feels like creating a quilt made of moments.
Stitched together, one by one.

If you let yourself pause for a moment
and imagine looking back on your life from some distant future—
what would you wish you had done more of?

You don’t need a perfect answer.
Just an honest one.

Don’t overthink it.

This prompt might help you respond spontaneously:

“If I’m honest, what I long for more of is ______.”

And with that, I wish you a New Year
that you move through the coming months with peace, love, and joy.

May you tend to what truly matters.

With love,
​xx Antonie

Do it before you die.
Some day will never come.

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P.S.: If you feel like it, you’re welcome to reply and tell me what you long for more of. I read every message.

P.P.S.: If this story made you nod, smile, or breathe a little deeper, and you'd like to say thank you in a small but meaningful way, you can leave me a little tip (or coffee!) here:

☕ Caffeinated Radiance Tip.

Your support helps me keep creating and sharing my work from the heart. 💛

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